If you aren't yet no-contact with the evangelicals in your life but need a way to cope while coming to terms with what they stand for, this shirt will allow you to attend such events while surrounded by a hedge of protection, and that hedge asks, "If you claim to follow Jesus then why don't you take Him seriously, you absolute corndogs?"

No heart will be left unconvicted and your sense of integrity will be at least partially upheld. And since evangelical culture is responsible for so much child abuse, 10% of all sales go towards the Prevent Child Abuse America fund.

Please report back any adventures and/or disruptions that occur as a result of your wearing this shirt. Every time I wear it people ask where I got it and I say "I made it bitches, and you can get one here while supporting Stuff Christian Culture Likes and taking religious hypocrites to task." Blessings!